I feel like a cracked teacup at times. A teacup that’s been dropped and glued back together. Most days I can focus on the positive parts of life, the un-cracked places, but there are some days I can only focus on the cracks in my life. These cracks become more apparent on special days like birthdays and holidays. The days you really want to be perfect. It’s on those days I find myself looking more at what I’m missing than what I have. I don’t like the cracks and missing parts of my life.
Over the summer I celebrated my birthday and it was on that day my focus was on what I didn’t have. I really tried to focus on what I had. No matter what I tried, counting blessings, reading scripture, and praying, it was all for naught. I still grieved for my dad. I still missed a friendship I wanted. What I wanted to happen could not. It couldn’t…but God could. He alone could heal my emptiness, fill the cracks and give me joy.
Out of desperation I went on a bike ride. I asked God for one thing, that I might see one deer as a sign my dad’s celebrating with me. Just one. I thought it would be his birthday gift to me. I cried when I saw two deer. Two! It was amazing! I kept riding and incredibly enough, kept counting. I not only saw one deer, I saw a total of twenty-eight that evening. Somewhere on that ride, my heart, my cracked teacup, went from empty to overflowing with love.
I still live a cracked teacup kind of life, but God’s love fills me to overflowing when I am empty. He glues and heals the cracks and missing places in my life, just as he promises in Romans 5:5.
What cracks and holes in your life need healing?
How can you let God heal those places?